Top 9 Lessons from the Bachelor for Daughters

Criticize me if you will, but my guilty pleasure is watching the Bachelor and the Bachelorette with my daughter since 2002. It’s my way to teach my daughter dating advice, “Top 9 Lessons from the Bachelor for Daughters.” This season, 33-year-old Chris Soules, a farmer from Iowa, aptly named Price Farming, tries to pick a mate from 30 contestants fighting for his err…heart and other things.Top 9 Lessons from the Bachelor for Daughters Stacey Gustafson

Why Jimmy Kimmel?

For reasons unknown, the producers decided to add Jimmy Kimmel to the mix. He sabotaged dates, asked uncomfortable questions, made strange comments and most importantly, almost ruined my reason for watching the Bachelor. Thanks Jimmy, you succeeded in making me feel stupid and ridiculous.

The Amazing Jar

The only thing Jimmy Kimmel added to the show was the introduction of the amazing jar. Each time the gals said “amazing” they had to add a dollar to a jar. But now they say, “super awesome” instead, Yeesh, is that any better? Best part of the entire show? Watch to the end to see Jimmy imitate the contestants. Now that’s good TV.

 Top 9 Lessons from the Bachelor for DaughtersTop 9 Lessons from the Bachelor for Daughters Stacey Gustafson

  1. Don’t throw up on your first date. Or talk about throwing up on past dates. Take a lesson from Jordan and Tara. Unfortunately, they survived the first round but eliminated Week 2.
  2. Wear shorts long enough to cover your butt. If you bought your shorts in the children department, prepare to have your ass covered with a black box. Kind of defeats your purpose, right Jillian?
  3. Never get in a hot tub with five other girls and one guy. Enough said.
  4. Lay off the prescription meds before you get on the show. Not sure what’s going on with Ashley S and her comment, “Fine zombies, take this one.” What?! I have to believe that the producers forced Chris to save this nut job (makes great TV) because she got a rose. Come on Chris. What would your grandma say? Stay tuned for more crazy next episode.
  5. False eyelashes will not work on a farm. Never. Ever. Period. Or a head bracelet. Ashley I, if you want to be Mrs. Chris Soules, you will be around hay, dust, dirt, manure, pig slop, and dirty farm hands. Don’t risk the eye infection.Top 9 Lessons from the Bachelor for Daughters Stacey Gustafson
  6. Whiny, squeaky voices are always annoying. Ashley I hits the top of the charts as she complains about not getting enough time with Chris. Even one minute.
  7. You do not need to drink goat milk, shovel manure or catch a pig to date a man. But you better be prepared to live in a town of 427 and hang with the old farts in Iowa if you want Chris. On his blog, “So, in a bit of a surprise, Carly caught the pig and won the whole thing. That girl really stepped up her game. I mean she drank unpasteurized goat’s milk and she’s lactose-intolerant!” Dang, she may win this whole show.
  8. If you say you’re a virgin, you better behave like one. When Ashley I kissed Chris she was terribly awkward but her words spoke volumes. “Obviously I hope Chris is that guy,” she tells the cameras. “But I need my opportunity, my time, to rise to the top.” I bet.Top 9 Lessons from the Bachelor for Daughters Stacey Gustafson
  9. On a reality show, everyone will be kissed. Go back to high school and find friends your own age, Mackenzie. Most awkward moment of the night: Mackenzie confronted Chris about kissing so many women. Hey, gal, have you ever watched the Bachelor before?

Catch up on more Bachelor news: http://abc.go.com/shows/thebachelor/cast/bachelor-chris-soules

Chris Soules’s Bachelor Blog: ‘I Know I’ve Maybe Kissed More Girls at This Point Than the Average Bachelorhttp://www.people.com/article/the-bachelor-chris-soules-blogs-episode-3

Do you have any lessons from the Bachelor for your daughters?

Top 9 Lessons from the Bachelor for Daughters stacey gustafsonBUY MY BOOK

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Comments

  1. Stacey, I call it brave to watch that show. One session was enough for me. Everything after that seemed like the same session. Your comments are hilarious.

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