Funny Actual Amazon Reviews for Climbing Claws, Stun Guns and Men’s Briefs

Funny Actual Amazon Reviews for Climbing Claws, Stun Guns and Men’s Briefs

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I’ve found an unexpected source of humor on the Internet, Actual Amazon Reviews. Amazon Reviews were originally meant to provide helpful warnings and advice to future customers.

Now Internet jokesters are using Amazon Reviews as a way to ridicule strange products like “Hand tiger” climbing claws and dangerous items, like stun guns. Even Amazon Reviews on men’s briefs can be a forum for high comedy. I’ve picked out some of my favorites below.

For more, read 8 Stupid Amazon Products With Impressively Sarcastic Reviews

http://www.cracked.com/article_18939_8-stupid-amazon-products-with-impressively-sarcastic-reviews.html

 

Funny Actual Amazon Reviews for Climbing Claws, Stun Guns and Men’s BriefsFury Martial Arts Tekagi-Shuko “Hand Tiger” Climbing Claws

Most Helpful Actual Amazon Reviews

4.0 out of 5 stars

Pretty good.

I must admit, I had pretty high expectations for these. I *stupidly* thought I would be able to climb or do anything with these. That of course was just wishful thinking, but all in all I give them a four out of five.

A few small problems: when you put weight on them, the metal part on the back digs into your hand. I just got some red Ace bandage and made sort of a glove to go under it. I like the way it looks. Also, Don’t think you can put all your weight on these. These are to ASSIST your climbing, you’re not supposed to rely on these only. One thing I learned the hard way: don’t just throw ’em in a bag and later reach in carelessly. You’ll end up bleeding.

4.0 out of 5 stars

Tree Climbers’ Friends

Requires some practice, patience, and strength. Tighten that strap down and be ready to hug the tree. Buy some good gloves. Watch your Face!

5.0 out of 5 stars

Barn Climbing good time

I use these to climb old abandoned buildings and it really helps me get a good grip, I recommend getting a pair of gloves with a small plate below the knuckles so the metal on the claws don’t dig into you.

5.0 out of 5 stars

love it

I loved the ninja hand claws they made everything easier when it came 2 climbing it really helped with stunts the claws were the best I think more people should buy them

3.0 out of 5 stars

Not very good for climbing tigers but very good for climbing tigers

I have given the Ninja Shuko Hand Claws Climbing Tiger Spikes – 2PC a medium rating as I was unable to test them by personally climbing any tigers. My local zoo declined to let me into the tiger enclosure to test them out and climb their tigers. This was, of course, very unfortunate and quite rude given that I had asked the lady at the ticket office about testing my latest purchase by climbing tigers after procuring my ticket (I still find it puzzling that she found it acceptable to laugh, spit out her coffee, drop her cigarette and send a text message whilst I was stood there).

 

Funny Actual Amazon Reviews for Climbing Claws, Stun Guns and Men’s BriefsSABRE S-1000SF Tactical Stun Gun with Built-in LED flashlight

Most Helpful Actual Amazon Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars

The light is quite blinding when directly shone into your eyes and can definitely make you feel like “deer in the headlights” as

I received this combo at a discounted rate for my honest opinion when my husband looked over my shoulder and said: “Oh, get that!” First of all, it’s bigger than I expected and heavier so I don’t think I’ll be carrying it around in my purse (unless I want to bash people with my purse, in which case, definitely will carry it around). The light is quite blinding when directly shone into your eyes and can definitely make you feel like “deer in the headlights” as demonstrated by my overeager husband with a: “IS THIS BRIGHT? *swings light into my eyes*”… Of course, I could see that it was quite bright when he shone it in the sunlight and I can still see the light. The stunner part (push the button towards you) is quite loud and very very terrifying even without trying it on anything but air. It makes a very loud zap noise which scared the bejezus out of our 80 lb usually fearless dog who attempted to hide in the tiny amazon cardboard box it came in.

4.0 out of 5 stars

Seems to be a good product

I’d give this 5 stars but I don’t have any way of knowing how effective the stun-gun part is. The flashlight works great. The stun-gun part makes a very intimidating sound. VERY. On the one hand, I’m glad that there is a switch you have to move on the bottom of the flashlight before the switch on the side of the flashlight will let the button engage the stun gun. I think I’m less likely to accidentally stun myself. On the other hand, I’m concerned that I won’t know whether the bottom switch is engaged if I need to use the stun-gun suddenly…So, beware before you purchase. And let me know if you have a safe way to test the stun gun.

2.0 out of 5 stars

Not as powerful as I would like

I can now comment on how well this works, as my boyfriend decided to test it out and stun myself (yes I know, he is crazy). Granted, he did stun himself so perhaps it isn’t the same as someone else doing it, but I was shocked he didn’t pass out or anything. He said it hurt pretty bad, but it didn’t exactly “stun” him, so I’m not sure how much protection this could be other than just make the person pretty mad. My boyfriend is 5 ft 10 and 170 pounds. So I am now rating this 2 stars instead of 5 as I don’t think it will protect you very very much unless the person is small.

1.0 out of 5 stars

Did not work as per instructions

The instructions are clear that the light will work whether the stun gun switch is in ON or OFF position, this was not the case with the one I received, light worked fine if stun gun switch is OFF, when it is on the stun gun does work, but light no longer works, making this useless as a self defense stun gun. Obviously the idea is surprise, if you have to tell the guy, “hey, would you mind waiting just minute while I try to find this little switch and convert my handy dandy little flashlight to a stun gun” then things are not going to go as planned

5.0 out of 5 stars

This flashlight/stun-gun WILL take down virtually any bad guy out there

I read every single review on the Sabre and still didn’t believe if this was all just some hype about it’s “stunning” properties, however let me clear it up very quickly for you. This flashlight/stun-gun WILL take down virtually any bad guy out there. Let me tell you it has a loud pop to it (big deal) that alone wont stop a nasty s.o.b, however the “shock” will ( especially in the chest or neck), I stunned myself on my right thigh for only 1 second and let me tell you this is no joke!! I was sitting down the right-side of my entire body went numb and my leg contracted kicking off my loosely fitted shoe and talk about a HORRIBLE experience ( I’m never doing that again)!!! IF you’ve ever been shocked with a live current it is similar to this stun-gun ( Not a taser, tasers are those metal claws that shoot out and clamp into the victims skin needing emergency room care to get them out). The Sabre has a 2 year warranty the others I’m pretty do not, and to boot it’s made in the USA!! You wont be disappointed!

Hanes Men’s 5-Pack Ultimate Boxer Brief – Assorted Packs Funny Actual Amazon Reviews for Climbing Claws, Stun Guns and Men’s Briefs

Most Helpful Actual Amazon Reviews 

These are so soft and comfortable I even prefer them to going ‘commando’ as the kids say or just meandering around nude. They offer the support of briefs with the freedom and non-butt crack ridingness of briefs. I think if I had a harem of silk-gloved goddesses to follow me around and carry my man-parts at all time, it would not be as comfortable and pleasant as these boxers.

 

5.0 out of 5 stars

Quality.

Like most guys, I grew up wearing “tighty whiteys”. 15 years ago my wife when we first started dating told me in no uncertain terms to wear boxers. So I tried them out and liked them fine. But I always missed the little hug and support one gets wearing tighties. Well, the boxer brief style gives a guy the best of both worlds. My wife likes the look and I like the fit.

5.0 out of 5 stars

Perfect

Very comfortable fabric with enough stretch to be comfortable and supportive. Tag-less design eliminates annoying tag itch. Guys look no further, just buy these and go back to doing something more interesting.

5.0 out of 5 stars

I went home to put these on and went back to work

They fit, nicely. Can’t wait to show them off to my perverted neighbors across the street. Enjoy the show weirdos.

5.0 out of 5 stars

my husband is very satisfied

My husband was getting tired of his under armor boxers which so far lasted 5 years. He started to get irritated with the spandex material in the fabric. I purchased these and they are soft, comfortable and affordable. They are not skin tight but fit good enough to hold his junk in. It does come with a slit in order to use the bathroom conveniently….men have a great advantage! Anyway he is 6’2 n 190 and we got him a medium. U can’t go wrong with these!

5.0 out of 5 stars

Manly Man Boxers

Having recently grown a beard I felt like I needed to man up in my under garments (do men say under garments? Probably not). These boxers are classic, and they make you feel like you are driving a 4×4 up a dirt road drinking black coffee while not reading instructions or asking for directions. Dangerous, yet safe and comfortable.

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Comments

  1. ha ha ha ha

  2. Haha these are really funny, sometime I also find really funny reviews but I never thought of posting it. Great job lol

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