To catch a raccoon became my mission. Each night, it ambushed our lawn, flattened leafy plants and ripped the grass to shreds. Chunks of sod rolled over. At this rate, we’d be down to topsoil and tree roots by the end of the month.
I called Carl’s Critter Control and explained our problem. Help was on the way.
The next day, he examined our yard and said, “Yep, you got raccoons. Best to kill what they eat. I’ll treat for grubs.”
What the heck do they eat? Turns out cream colored coiled grubs and beetles burrowed in our lawn, the raccoon’s version of escargot.
He injected the lawn with chemicals to kill the meal.
For about two weeks, the treatment worked and we didn’t notice any additional nocturnal activity. But soon, black patches of exposed soil started to appear on our lush yard.
Old Beady Eyes
After dinner out, we turned into the driveway and spotted glowing red eyes, a black mask, and ringed tail peeking out under the shrubs. It was Old Beady Eyes. He held our sod in one nimble hand and in the other, gave us the one finger salute.
Got you in the crosshairs buddy!
To remove raccoons, the Internet suggested I try coyote urine sprinkled around our property. Or I could play loud music, staple chicken wire down on the soil, and use bowls of red-hot Jamaican habanero pepper sauce as deterrent. My friend even suggested I have my husband and son urinate around the lawn.
Next morning I called Carl. “What’s its cost to catch a raccoon?” I asked.
“Lady, a one time charge of $150 to set the trap,” he said. “Then it’s $150 to release the raccoon 10 miles away.”
A regular Ponzi scheme.
He arrived within the hour. “Can’t believe you still have problems,” he said.
“See for yourself. Our neighborhood homeowner’s association threatened to fine us.”
Catch a Raccoon
After he set the trap along the driveway he said, “Want me to show you how to open the trap if your dog gets stuck?”
“No way am I letting him out in the front yard. That will not be a problem.”
“Did I mention that you might catch a skunk or the neighbor’s cat? The odor of the bait is really strong.”
The next day I caught Beady Eyes. He was the mother of all raccoons, bigger than our dog. Carl picked him by dinnertime and offered to set the trap again since we had use of the trap for seven days.
Why not? Maybe Beady Eyes had a girlfriend.
Release the Raccoon
As he was leaving, I flagged him to stop. “Hey, you’re not gonna take the raccoon to the end of my street and release him? Right?”
“You’re so funny!” he laughed and zoomed away.
Three days passed. By Sunday, I realized I couldn’t flush the entire neighborhood of raccoons. I needed a new strategy. This was getting expensive. I called Carl’s Critter Control to pick up the trap the next day.
Two more days passed before they arrived.
“Guess what?” I said to my son. “I caught another raccoon.”
Hey, I think I’ve seen you before Old Beady Eyes.
“How many does that make?” he asked. “You’re a regular Steve Irwin.”
Final tally: Raccoons 2, Neighbor’s Cat 1. Price: $600.
I’m sure this will not be my last run in with raccoons. Please email me back if you have a better solution.
Funny YouTube video of raccoons destroying yard.
Midnight Battle with a Raccoon http://kenthomas.us/?p=408