How Long to Microwave 25-lb Turkey Prank

How to cook 25lb turkey prank stacey gustafsonMillennials, you think you’re so funny. “How Long Would It Take To Microwave a 25-lb Turkey” prank rolled through Internet this week, tricking your parents, Baby Boomers and Generation Xers. We willingly fell into the trap. After all, we’re guilty of protecting our Millennials from having to do anything more difficult than set the table on Thanksgiving. For most, this would be their first time to attempt to cook the mother of all birds, the turkey. We never suspected their question was not genuine.

How long cook 25b turkey prank stacey gustafson

According to Wikipedia,

Millennials, also known as Generation Y or Gen Y, are the generational demographic cohort following Generation X and preceding Generation Z. There are no precise dates for when this cohort starts or ends; demographers and researchers typically use the early 1980s as starting birth years and the mid-1990s to early 2000s as ending birth years. Millennials are sometimes referred to as “echo boomers” due to a major surge in birth rates in the 1980s and 1990s, and because millennials are often the children of the baby boomers. The generation has been generally marked by an increased use and familiarity with communications, media, and digital technologies.

As they laughed their butts off, parents attempted to answer, with a straight face, their phone calls and text message, “How Long Would It Take To Microwave a 25-lb Turkey.” Results were hilarious.

Here’s my kid’s prank via text message:

“How long would it take to microwave a 25lb turkey?”

Daughter: Hi Mom!! How long would it take to microwave a 25lb turkey??

Me: Frozen?

Daughter: Yah, frozen.

Me: You really should thaw first. Takes at least two days in the sink/refrigerator. Microwave not recommended to cook it. Will taste bad.

Daughter: OK.

Me: Trust me. It will not be good. Why are you doing this? You can buy fresh turkey, little more expensive and harder to find. Did you even test if it would fit in the microwave?

Daughter: Oh, it seems like a bad idea. This was for a friend. I think the turkey would not be able to spin in the microwave anyway.

Me: Check your email. I sent you a link.

Then I proceeded to spend another 15 minutes to determine if this was actually possible. It would take 250 minutes to microwave a frozen turkey. But since my microwave can’t even handle more than one bag of popcorn, I’m pretty certain the inevitable kitchen fire wouldn’t be worth the effort.

You got me this time Millennial! Next year it’s my turn, kid.

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