How to Avoid a Paranormal New Year’s Eve

New Year’s Eve

Back in 2000, my husband and I attended our last big bash, The Millennial New Year’s Eve Party, a black tie event with sit down dinner and fireworks included. Since then, it’s been nothing but sitting around watching Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve television special.

How to Avoid a Paranormal New Year's Eve Stacey Gustafson

Image courtesy of Ambro at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

However, I can vicariously live through my 70 year-old mother’s experiences. She’s never one to miss a good party and lives it up each year in ways ranging from wonderful and near fatal to strange and surreal.

Auto Vs. Beast

Last year Mom and her fiancé grabbed a horse drawn carriage ride in downtown St. Louis to see the Christmas lights at midnight. Sounds like a romantic way to celebrate, right? You’d be wrong. Near tragedy struck when a drunken woman hit their horse with a car, classic automobile vs. beast hit-n-run accident. They waited for hours to get a replacement carriage, sans horse. Fortunately, the horse survived but their nerves, not so much.

Paranormal Express

This New Year’s Eve featured something more sedate. My mom called me with the news. “Remember I told you we were were going on a mystery train ride at 2pm to after midnight?”

“Yeah, sort of.”

“Turned into an unforgettable evening. A little something I refer to as the Paranormal Express.”

“God, that doesn’t sound good. What happened?”

How to Avoid a Paranormal New Year's Eve Stacey gustafson

The “real” Grandma and Buddy.

“I knew it was bad when we boarded. Ed, the party planner, introduced himself through a flurry of sneezes and coughs that cleared the area. Thank God I brought wet wipes but only had three in my purse to last the whole trip.”

She retold her New Year’s Eve story with gusto when she realized she held my full attention. Not a single minute detail left out.

“After we boarded, Ed aka “Sneezer” handed out snacks. You’ll never guess what they were.”

“Pretzels? Mini-hotdogs? Pizza?”

“Nope. Individual Fig Newtons straight from the package. With his bare hands. We each got two.”

“Oh. My. God.”

She described the train ride as it ambled through small town America laced with strands of bright lights to guide the route.

“It was a pretty peaceful trip. We met some interesting people.”

“Tell me more.”

She shared stories about the folks they met onboard the train, including a low talker from Illinois and a weird couple who looked like Gomez and Mortician from the Addams Family.

Want a Slim Jim?

“About an hour into the trip, we got Slim Jim sticks,” she said with a click of her tongue. “At least they were wrapped.”

“Gross.”

“I wish you were there. Simply unbelievable.”

After three hours they arrived at their dinner destination, Rosie’s Pub in Normal, Illinois. “Food was okay. Sat with nice people.”

After reboarding, they toasted midnight with sparkling cider to wash down the remaining Slim Jims, cheddar cheese sticks and leftover Fig Newtons.

Yum.

“Oh yeah. Forgot to mention. When we exited, we received a plastic railroad whistle that was defective. And a dollar scratch-off lottery ticket.”

She’s already planning next year bash, The Very Ninja New Year’s Eve Party, whatever that is. I plan to sit this one out again.

How do you celebrate New Year’s Eve? Share your story!

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Comments

  1. This year on New Year’s Eve, my husband, Bob, and I were both tired from a grueling 2014. All we wanted to do was sleep it off and awake to a new year, with 2014’s challenges behind us. But our neighbor had planned a big party, with lots of food and games. We had to go. I worked all day and didn’t have time to prepare a dish. Instead, I located a pretty Christmas platter in my kitchen and filled it with slices of cheese and salami received as a Christmas gift. I said a prayer of thanks to Hickory Farms and then filled another plate with chocolates from the oversized box that our niece had given us, probably because someone had given it to her and she did’t want to be tempted by 5 pounds of chocolate. I stuffed a canned margarita in each of my coat pockets and headed down the street in the dark, trying to balance my fragile festive mood and two trays of snacks while dodging potholes and puddles.

    Bob had installed doors in an office building all day, work that was more physically challenging than he was accustomed to. At home, he hot tubbed and showered to quiet his screaming muscles before heading to the party—late. As always, there was too much food. And we wanted to try everything. And as always, overeating made us even more tired. Did someone mention playing Pictionary? Ugh. I knew I couldn’t do that when I was so sleepy. Bob and I looked at each other through barely open eyes. I pushed myself away from the table and excused myself ,and so did he. It was 10 p.m. It was the New Year somewhere, and that was good enough for us. By 10:15, we had gathered our coats and dishes, had walked home and stripped off our party clothes and were in bed celebrating the end of 2014. By 10:16, we were both asleep, only barely waking to hear the midnight fireworks. Ah, it felt good to start 2016 well rested. Happy New Year.

  2. We spent New Years Eve at the Berkeley Yacht Club for dinner, dancing, and at midnight, a great view of the fireworks in San Francisco. We hadn’t done New Years Eve there before but will consider it another year.

  3. We usually stay home, play cards, drink champagne and try to stay awake until midnight!

    • staceygustafson says

      Yep, I consider it a huge accomplishment if I stay up past midnight. This year it was dinner, movie and a midnight kiss. In bed by 12:05!

  4. Your mom – I want to party with her! Is she available for weddings and Bar Mitzvahs?

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